Famous TV presenter spoke about how to deal with kids. Have hit home with Larsen grows up two sons, Luke and John, and daughter, Martha. Especially for the “StarHit” she decided to share her years of maternal experience.
TV presenter tutta Larsen has three children – 11-year-old Luke, six year old Martha and polutorogodovalogo Ivan. Celebrity dispelled the most common myths that often confront young parents. She told about the rules in your family. Tutta Larsen: “In our family everything revolves around children”
Myth # 1. Mom must strictly observe the regime of the day
Yes, the daily routine should be. And it is better to synchronize with the regime of the baby, but not absolutely subordinate to him. No wonder the mother is given almost a month to completely devote themselves to the child. These days, a woman’s body is restored, and the newborn adapts to the new conditions of life. And that mother and baby begin to get into a certain system of interaction and coexistence, which is comfortable to both. Many women are trying to regain your prenatal chart, for example, to sit at night on Facebook or frequently engage in fitness and want to combine it all with a baby who does not sleep at night. You need to leave all their old things and accept new conditions of existence. Moms who are able to adapt to the regime, over time, can connect your old favorites.
But still a woman should always remember: how much a child sleeps when he likes to be held or in the stroller, and when he needs a nipple. I guess it’s difficult to call the regime should rather be a process of adaptation.
Myth # 2. Children should be fed only breast milk
I’m exclusively breastfeeding. Think it is wrong, when in the hospital my mom say that you have not enough milk, let’s feed the artificial. And then the parent could not establish breastfeeding because the baby does not want to. A woman who is preparing to leave, need to see what feeding is and how it goes. I am totally against any mix, and I think it’s just a crime. Of course, there are situations in which milk is not. But if there’s any way to breast-feed, need to fight for it.
Myth # 3. Young mother needs a special diet
I welcome the European approach to nutrition moms. Nowhere in the world except Russia, there is no such concept of “diet nursing mums.” Our poor women suffer – sit on a buckwheat and cabbage. Of course, should not be too democratically to treat blue cheese and mango, you can eat them but in small quantities and up to two hours of the day. If a child has a reaction to these products, then in the evening you will see and understand. In other cases, all that you loved during pregnancy, and during breastfeeding.
Myth # 4. While the child is small and does not understand anything, do not need to spend time talking with him
It’s some kind of monstrous myth that child in the womb is not a person, and the fruit, and when he is born, knows nothing! I can say with one hundred percent guarantee that the baby from the first hours of life is conscious; he sees a mother and is able to answer her.
I have a video where my Vanya, who was a month and a half, talked to me, but in their own language. I asked him questions, and he told me in his answer. That is, he was clearly with me in communication.
And attentive mom knows that the first half hour and preferably an hour after birth, the baby should only be in her arms. He should see my mom’s eyes because in this moment between them is sealing. This is the beginning of maternal instinct and in General prevention of postpartum depression. Mothers whose children are taken immediately, take to wash and swaddle, then, without realizing it, fall into the pity party mode.
All mammals have this mode enabled when they take the child, it’s a hormonal reaction in our body that is inherent the nature. Of course, with the baby we need to talk, his need to hold on the handles. It’s already scientifically proven that when a newborn is often picked up, then it develops better intelligence.
Myth # 5. It is not necessary every time to pay attention to the baby crying, he would calm down
Crying is a signal, a real fire alarm. If baby is all fine and good, he is calm. Children cry only if they feel any discomfort, if they have something hurts or they are hungry. Mother a month later to learn to distinguish the hunger cry from the cry, which caused by a spasm or colic. The baby is never cranky just. The only way to convey to the world their desires is a cry and tears. If your baby is screaming is a signal for instant action.
She was a very experienced woman and knew in raising a lot more than me. But after a while, I began to accept her advice and experience as a gift. I began to learn from her many things that relate to child care. But some basic things, the value and deep – the responsibility of parents.
Myth # 6. Nanny should be responsible for the upbringing of children
I believe that the sitter is an assistant, someone can perceive it as a staff, but for me it’s a family member. But, nevertheless, the basic values and some basic rules for the child should lay parents. Education is the area of responsibility of moms and dads, no need to blame everything on the assistant, she just takes the will of those with whom she works. You know, Luke, I turned so that I was very jealous of the nanny.
Myth # 7. In the education of boys and girls no difference
It seems to me, with the children more difficult because they are more fragile and delicate. The boys are very vulnerable from an early age before they begin to pose challenges: don’t cry, hold on, hold on, don’t fight, and something else. But they do not cease to be gentle babies. Them very much high requirements on the one hand, and with another – to educate the boy, the motivation and the responsibility is much more complicated than in the girl.
Here’s my own experience, I can say that when my son was born, I forgave all men. Let go of all resentment, betrayal, any misunderstanding and problems that I had in the relationship. Men I suddenly became so clear, I felt sorry for them, they are so hard. They have adaptive capacity is much lower than in women. Girl by nature more flexible, prone to compromise, and the boys much harder, in my opinion.
Myth # 8. The grandmother is the chief assistant in the upbringing of children
It is important to remember that the family is mom, dad and baby. Very often, the grandmother ignores the fact that in this family home mom. And mothers suddenly start to feel some delinquent teenagers. Grandma can assume anything, but always solves mom. Older relatives quite often take the initiative in their hands, and parents meekly concede to them the wheel for the management of his family. But this can not happen, this must be addressed. Grandmother, of course, family and favorite people, but they must obey the rules that are instituted in your family. If not, then you need to consult a specialist who will help to adjust the relations.
Myth # 9. Strictness is better than indulgence
Austerity is totally unnecessary factor in communicating with children. In our family we generally abandoned the concepts of “strictness and punishment.” We want to communicate. Self-indulgence does not happen by accident. The kids don’t behave badly just means that they are missing something. All they can do is what they are taught to adults. All reactions, manipulations, behavior is the reflection of our actions. Need to think about what you’re doing wrong.
Myth No. 10. Excessive trusteeship gives the child to explore the world
Yes, and this in itself needs to struggle, especially with the parent panic. For example, when children get sick, many moms and dads get scared, fall into a stupor and begin to heal kids. Need to overcome the fears and not to overload the attention of your child. It is better to allow children that are not dangerous to their health and life.
The word “no” we use very rarely. If you have a child something forbidden, it needs something to allow. A very wise psychologist once told me: if you close before the baby is one door you open another. You need to learn to negotiate, to find an approach and a compromise is much more difficult, but more effective.
Myth No. 11. Older children care for younger
I do not agree. The older children did not have anything, they didn’t ask you to have a baby. They are absolutely not required to share their toys and space. Senior can do it, if you teach them if you ask about it, if you do care for younger children an interesting and exciting process. But if the family has many children, the eldest just have to help and take care of Junior.
However, if the family is not large, it is not necessary to insist that the eldest child took care of brothers and sisters. The fact that you gave birth to a second child, does not mean that the former automatically became an adult. He also wants affection, attention and love.
From April 17 on TV “Dомашний” starts a new season of the reality show “Pregnant”, where tutta Larsen attended.